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Home ARGUMENT LIST Marriage Why should people stay virgin till they are married?

Why should people stay virgin till they are married?

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< Because God thinks it's best for people and it keeps the marriage pure. 

There are probably countless reasons to remain a virgin till marriage (or if not a virgin, to not be promiscious before marriage), but the most important reason is that God knows that it's best for his people to remain virgins to marriage. 

For one, marriage is holy, and having sex with multiple partners leads to one becoming defiled. As it says it here:

Deu 24:4  then her former husband, who sent her away [divorce], may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the LORD. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the LORD your God is giving you for an inheritance.  

As this passage states, when a woman lies with a man, she has become defiled, because the man she slept with isn't her husband. After being defiled, for her to go back to the original husband would be considered an abomination before God, and a sin. Notice, this is not concerning adultery! 

Also, Jesus doesn't agree with sleeping around without a husband: 

Joh 4:17  The woman [a Samaritan] answered him, "I have no husband." Jesus said to her, "You are right in saying, 'I have no husband'; 
Joh 4:18  for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true."

As Jesus implied here, the woman is supposed to be a wife to the man she now has.  

In addition, God pointed out that if a man sedduces a woman to have sex who is not married or engaged, then he is to marry her:

Exo 22:16  "If a man seduces a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall give the bride-price for her and make her his wife. 

God considers virginity serious enough to force the seducer to marry the one he seduced. Also note that the bride-price is a very expensive price to pay. 

Finally, if a woman wasn't a virgin (although she lied about being a virgin at marriage), she could get killed for that, and the following scripture proved that men wanted virgins and had the right to put them to death if they weren't what they said they were:

Deu 22:14  ...and accuses her of misconduct and brings a bad name upon her, saying, 'I took this woman, and when I came near her, I did not find in her evidence of virginity,'

Deu 22:20  But if the thing is true, that evidence of virginity was not found in the young woman, 

Deu 22:21  then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones, because she has done an outrageous thing in Israel by whoring in her father's house. So you shall purge the evil from your midst. 

[please read context]

Hence, God shows in many places why virginity before marriage is wanted.  

>> What if a person lost their virginity.

< Then they could just hold themselves till marriage (although they must be honest about their virginity). 

A person can still marry if they aren't virgins... even a prostitute married a prophet, and yet she wasn't stoned to death. 

Consider this verse: 

Hos 1:2  When the LORD first spoke through Hosea, the LORD said to Hosea, "Go, take to yourself a wife of whoredom and have children of whoredom, for the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the LORD."  (ESV) 

 >> But killing non-virgins (before being married) is wrong.... about 90% of people are non-virgins. 

<  Killing non-virgins (before being married) was only concerned with lying about a person' state of virginity at marriage. 

>> But notice it says "...whoring in her father's house. So you shall purge the evil from your midst."

Simply whoring is enough of getting killed. That's wrong. 

< Please see the argument below: 

 The argument is entitled: "Well, Christ didn't condemn people because the curse of the law is thankfully paid for by Christ's death."  

< Well, Christ didn't condemn people because the curse of the law is thankfully paid for by Christ's death

If you notice, Jesus didn't push for the Samaritan to get killed. So it proves that Jesus was forgiving of sin and not condemning to death. In fact, this is also revealed even for an adulteress:    

Joh 8:4  they said to him, "Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. 
Joh 8:5  Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?"  

...

Joh 8:11  ... And Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you [the adulteress]; go, and from now on sin no more."]]  

[please read context] 

Notice here that Jesus doesn't even condemn the adulteress, and has forgiven her sin, and has told her to not sin anymore.  


 

 

< Because by waiting, it creates a stronger bond for the two, so that they can raise kids and have a successful family.

1) since sex requires ONLY 2 partners and is ultimately satisfying to both, it creates an ultimate bond between the two. Having sex with many partners reduces this bond. It's no longer "you are the special person I’ve chosen" but "you're one of them I did it with". Also sex requires the two to be naked, exposing every inch of their bodies to each other. The fact that 2 people undress themselves in front of each other willingly shows their oneness, hence why they need marriage. Doing this without marriage becomes extremely questionable, since they are not even doing something under a strict contract. It’s like two people who do risky business without an explicit strict contract to not share secrets outside of the union. It’s risky behavior and it’s a good reason God prohibits it.

2) After the sex, conceiving a child creates another strong bond. The genetics from both partners come together to form a new one, but retaining the characteristics of the parent genes. There are no other genetics that are added, no outside stranger, hence why marriage should be between 2 people only. Since the child is their very own flesh, they are utterly most responsible to care for it, which we naturally see.
For example, non-drugged parents willingly and repeatedly sacrifice their lives for their children.




< Because pre-marital sex contributes to adultery. 

It contributes to adultery because of the following reasons:  

1) when a man gets married to a person other than his first partner, then he and his first partner would have to break the bond that was created from their first series of sex, in order to get married to a different person. And because the first bond has to be broken, the second bond won't be as strong, because it can be broken like the first bond. Having experience in breaking bonds contribute to the habit of breaking bonds in the future. Thus adultery is more likely. 

2) having sex before marriage reveals no self-control. Self control is needed to avoid adultery, especially with girls/guys at work, school, and other arenas. Thus it's easier to commit adultery. 

>> Well, I don't remember the first person I had sex with.

So there was never a bond to break.  

< Probabably because you are being promiscuous.   

The bond by now probably is so weak due to how many other current bonds are made.  


 

Last Updated on Saturday, 26 November 2011 21:00  

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